I Can't Help Myself

I can't help myself today. I have to complain. I know that is something folks don't expect from me but it has been one of those days and it isn't even three o'clock. I decided yesterday that Justin and I needed to trim the hedges that were overgrown at his house on the corner of Cemetery and Oak Street.  Sounds simple, correct. No so much. First, I had to locate the hedge trimmers.  Justin said Rob had them at our house.  Rob said Justin had them.  I looked in our garage, Dad's garage, Justin's garage, no hedge trimmers.  I called Rob he said maybe that they were in our garage by side the refrigerator. I took Justin with me to look.  We looked and looked. In the process I decided to throw away Rob's bucket collection.  The collection that he keeps for all the work projects that he is always going to do.  "Going to do" would be the key words. You know "I might need that to put dirt in, or mix cement, mix paint, haul rock, sit on, clean out the pellet stove or haul something in it."  Guess what Rob?  You were at the beach all last summer, at the beach this summer and as far as I know you are still in your major recovery that started in August so the 999 buckets went out to the trash. Oh, it was only 996, because Justin took 3 for all the work he doesn't do. Justin finally found the hedge trimmers under a tarp on top of the snow blower in the back of the garage about 3 miles from the refrigerator.  Justin and I headed back up Oak Street to his house and started the trimming job.  Which went rather well UNTIL, Dad said to haul a rotten log planter off from the front yard, if there was room in the truck. What ensued next had all the makings for a nuclear war. It seems that the rotten planter log was a gift to Mom from guess who?  You guessed it, the Golden Child, David.  So, Mom and Dad got into it over the rotten log. I think Mom forgot that she tried to pay someone $30.00 last week to cut and dig out Dad's favorite fern in the front yard. I was hot, hungry and sweating from the hedge trimming and hadn't had breakfast and it was only noon. I just wanted to go to Cool Springs and get something to eat with Justin. Next big mistake was I asked Mom to go. She won't ride in the car with Dad. So off Justin, Dad and I went to Cool Springs.  I had a foot long hot dog with chili, onions, mustard and ketchup and cheese cubes.  Justin and I decided that Cool Springs is a lot like Cheers but without the beer, you know where everyone knows your name. Today it would have been nice to have had three or maybe even four shots of Jack Daniels but I had to settle for chocolate milk. We finished our lunches.  Justin headed to Bell Hill to check out the road.  Dad and I headed to town to get the mail. I put on my body armor  and entered the house.  Mom said that Rick had called from Italy and said to tell everyone hello. Dad informed me that my phone was making a noise. It was Rob he remembered where the hedge trimmers were in the garage. There is a reason people drink.