I Hate Cell Phones

The last two days have been more than trying. Everyone knows I hate cell phones. I hate people being able to have constant communication contact with me. I generally only like talking to people if I have something to say. I don't really care what other people have to say or think, especially David and Chris. I am well known for having a cell phone but turning it off and also never listening to my messages. I feel that if something is really important it will be on face book. I also misplace my phone quite frequently as I did two days ago which ended up in a Felton/Morell family melt down. I left my phone at my Mom and Dad's house. They found my phone and tried to call me.  That didn't work but they kept trying and wondered why I didn't answer.  Dad finally convinced Mom to call my house phone. Rob and I haven't had a land phone for months so that didn't work either. Mom got frantic and called Cassie.  Cassie came over and convinced Mom that I couldn't answer my phone because they had my phone.  Cassie delivered my phone to me.  I didn't even know it was missing.  Mom now reminds me to take my phone with me. Now at this point you would think all is well.  It isn't!  Yesterday, I made sure I had my phone and I brought it in the house with me. Why, I have no idea but I felt compelled to put up the orange pumpkin Halloween lights for fall. So I headed outside with the tangle of lights, Buster on his lead, and guess what no phone!!!!  Well, Rob was at the Bikini Shoppe in Ormond.  He said he was looking at the clearance rack for me.  Like, I believe that.  Anyway, I didn't answer so he called Mom and Dad's house. They said I went home with my phone.  So, I guess they tried to call me. Guess, what folks?  I'm outside putting up lights. Then Rob called again, still no Debra.  Then Mom and Dad called again, still no answer. Them Mom and Dad called Justin in Morgantown. I guess at this point I must have been finished hanging the orange pumpkin light mess, which I have decided I will never do again. Hanging those lights kind of felt like having a root canal without my famous Dr. McHot. OK, back to the cell phone thing. As I walked in the house Justin called and wanted to know where I was and what I was doing. At this point I was so tempted but anyway I said I was home. "Why aren't you answering your phone, everyone is looking for you." I tried to explain I was hanging up the traditional orange lights and watching his dog. "Well, Dad is trying to call you!" Like, that has never happened before. Justin continues to give me the run down of the previous 955 phone calls I have missed and thousands of messages I've never listened to or responded to. OK, OK, I'll call everyone. First, I could Mom and Dad. Dad had already forgotten I was missing. Then I called Rob, who was still at the Bikini Shoppe.  I asked him what was so important. I could sense the desperation in his voice to come up with something. Here it is or so he says. He found a cute pink strapless sundress he thought I just couldn't live without.  REALLY ROB. It is rainy, cold, and it is probably going to snow here next week but if it will make you feel better buy the sun dress and get out of the bikini shoppe because I know what the girls in the bikini shoppe are wearing, and stop calling Mom and Dad when I'm missing. I want to be missing.  I HATE CELL PHONES!