Lunch With David

Mom and I traveled to Morgantown today to have lunch with David and Kayla.  First we checked out the house Mom and Dad will be residing in during the harsh winter months beside David.  David and I were in a discussion downstairs when Kayla showed up. Kayla immediately irritated David which made me happy. I honestly don't understand David.  He explained to me that the refrigerator wasn't working properly but the freezer still worked but he unplugged it so he could take the food out of the freezer. That made no sense to me but since David is Mom's favorite and she was sitting there in the kitchen.  I kept my mouth shut.  Kayla on the other hand, opened the freezer door which allowed all the self contained odors of the heated up freezer to penetrate the house. David began to yell at Kayla. Kayla yelled at David. Kayle asked David why he unplugged the refrigerator.  Bingo I thought. Kayla and I walked out on the deck. Kayla preceded to tell me she had thought about teaching at the same school as David but she didn't think she could share the same school with him everyday.  I asked her how should would like to share the same womb and bedroom until we turned six. I think I have suppressed memories of trying to suffocate David but I'm not sure.  Maybe it will come out in therapy someday.  On to Bob Evans for lunch. I let David drive my car because I didn't want to listen to how much better he can drive than me.  So I put Mom up front with her favorite child and Kayla and I set in the back with our designer purses and sunglasses and pretended David was our chauffeur.  Kayla and I got Mom inside and David joined us. We had a nice lunch.  David ordered double mashed potatoes. I had a grilled cheese. Mom had fish. Kayla Chicken Parmesan. David left the table frequently to visit other guests eating. This bothered Kayla but I was just glad to get a break from David. Kayla felt sorry for the people David kept visiting.   Lunch over it was back to David's house. David has a dog named Owen.  Owen and David both need therapy. One main reason I stopped back at David's was to use the bathroom. David wouldn't let me use the bathroom until he gave me a lecture about how to flush the toilet. I would of just used the other bathroom but Zoey was taking a shower.  Once in the bathroom, I was confronted with a sign (written by the toilet) that said this toilet does not accept poop.  I'm totally serious. What is with that?  I don't know if it is just that toilet, all of David's toilets and I really didn't want to know. Which gets back to David and his dog, Owen, needing therapy.  Owen is afraid of everything, a bath, being brushed, the air, etc. He also kind of looks like David.  I suggested to David owner, pet therapy.  Kayla liked the idea.  Zoey finally made it out into the living room and we discussed our up coming surfing lessons, which David is jealous of because he is  not invited. Spiker kept calling David about golf clubs, so Kayla, Zoey and I discussed purses and the beach.  Owen kept jumping all over everyone and Rosie the other dog was equally annoyed. Nikki and Zoey have beautiful cats that look at David and Owen like they belong in a mental institution. Needless to say when Mom and I got back to Rowlesburg an hour or so later, I dropped Mom off and retreated to my bedroom with a bag of M&M's, a diet Cherry Pepsi, a Xanax and Midnight. Three hours later. Life is Good, again.